5 wine, 3 champaign bottles later..

Well I threw my party. It was fun, I have to say party planning is new for me, so it was a learning experience. First off, you really need to invite alot more people since the # of people who don't come is generally high. Still it was cool, I think I had about 25 people total, maybe 15 at once so it was a comfortable #.

I will have to decide if I'll throw another one like this again or not. I may opt for a smaller dinner party instead, or go for a full raging party and invite like 100 people (and expect 30 to show up??). Who knows. For now I'm off to vacation!!

Next report will come from HK or HCM

The Passion and the Party

Did I mention how I am not at all passionate about any of the girls I have dated so far? It is a big problem. The last 2 girlfriends I had were girls I was totally head over heels into bigtime in terms of connection, attraction, and passion. It may be asking alot, but apparently its very critical to have that feeling. Thus I am ending my dating spree with a grand party at my place.

I don't know how grand it will be, I realize that party planning is an art, and its not easy!

First off.. you must balance the # of men to women. It is not easy finding single girls in general, let alone come to your party. Thus I have a good # of non-single girls, but thats okay, better to have the eye candy than just a bunch of dudes leeching on my free booze.

Second, you have to figure out how many people to invite, based on the knowledge that not all will show at the same time, and some will bring alot more people than expected, and some will not show. You don't want too many, but a few too many is better than no one at all.

Third, based on the unknown # of people, you have to plan food and drinks. Having enough beer, wine, ice, etc, and food. Food is tricky, as a single bachelor I am not cooking and really not in the mode of feeding everyone, so I said appetizers and snacks, which translates to random food like egg rolls, spring rolls, satay sticks, chips, dip, etc.

One amusing and potentially dangerous thing is that I'm inviting a few girls that I've dated before all to the same party. Hopefully no big deal.

Sunday sunday

I didn't do much today. Ran some errands to get ready for my xmas party.

Throwing an xmas party is not cheap. I don't give out $20 jamba cards like tombo, but still buying booze & food adds up, and many people who come to parties are leechers and will gladly drink up all your booze. Thats why many parties only offer cheap ass stuff like Heineken and cheap wine. But alas, my party is not as cheap, so I offer Hennessey, Patron, Grey Goose, decent wine, and champaign. I'd estimate total cost to throw a party, $500 in food and booze.

While I have a big condo here in Snoob Hill, I should try to throw one every quarter though. More often if I can keep costs under control.

Otherwise I didn't do anything today. I felt lazy. I slept alot. Sometimes thats just what I need though. Kind of catch up from all the bad sleep I get during the week.

The burn rate

Money is burning fast this last few months.

I think its okay, I was in recovery and I was burning money to help enjoy life. It was well deserved given I was a cheap bastard for a while.

Like tonight I bought a round of shots for everyone at happy hour. Only cost $35 (7*$5) this time, but still thats how you burn the $$$$ !! Also throwing a holiday party, that is probably going to cost me $$$$ as well.

My guilty pleasure of the month? A pair of shoes. Do you know what Cordovan leather is? Its apparently the toughest leather around and is from the ass-cheeks of horses. Supposedly its the best. Alden from New England makes them into classic dress shoes for a whopping $480. Yep, thats my extravagant purchase of the year.

My justification on shoes is that paying to redo the soles is a better deal long term.

Oh well, the way I see it.. you only live once. As long as you are somewhat within budget then screw it. I'm not sure if I'm in budget, but I'm not bleeding yet.

So I paid a bill

My ex-gf semi-stuck me with the cancel fee for VZN to split our accounts. It was kind of stupid, because she just had to keep the damn account like 2 more months in order to keep within contract and then get out for free. But alas.. she transfers the # and closes it, sticking me with a $175 bill.

On the flip side, I haven't paid her deposit for the apt back which I think was like $1500 or so, I don't know now because the docs splitting the costs are all lost. So whatever.

I often think back to all the happier times and it kills me. I need to think more about the shitty times to get perspective.

Case in point:

I remember her telling me how the 2ndary market for video game rentals kills new game sales because the game publishers make nothing on rentals and it lowers new game sales. My counter point is that the rental market is a natural evolution of any commodity like video movies or books. I'm sure book publishers were up in arms at the idea of a place loaning books for free, they probably thought it would destroy sales and ruin the publishing business. You have to adapt your biz model to new markets. But when I try to bring out this type of intellectual conversation she would get pissed and feel like I was just trying to argue with her and that she is just trying to say it hurts their sales.

Bah, lame. Guess thats somewhat of a 'men from mars, women from venus' thing.

This one psycho I have to write about...

I like to think I'm a nice guy. I don't think I'm a rotten guy anyways, ie I don't mess around w/ girls just for kicks, I am pretty much a relationship guy.

So anyways I went out on a meeting/date w/ this online girl a month or so back that I should document here. I was not that optimistic about it, because of various factors. Anyways she wanted to have dinner, but I am now experienced enough to know not to have dinner w/ someone you are unsure of, you should have wine or coffee or just meet at the water fountain maybe. Limit the time and $$ committment!

So.. my impressions of her was that she was kind of cute, but not that cute, but more importantly, she seemed like a bitch in many ways. Clues:
1) She got the impression I didn't have a car, and seemed shocked. I said no, I have a car, I just don't drive often. Then she asks what kind of car I drive. Impression: materialistic
2) She said she's gone on horrible date after date so rarely goes on dates now. Impression: hates men and has given up
3) She told me about a guy she dated who had leukemia as a kid, and how she didn't want to date someone w/ medical issues. Impression: not very compassionate
4) Talked about how she loves to gamble but almost always wins because she's good at blackjack Impression: gambaholic/idiot
5) Said she was turned off by one dude who said he's liberal and is okay being a house-husband because she felt he was saying he's a leech. and doesn't want to work Impression: selfish and materialistic
6) Talked about how when she was young she remembers being able to get any guy she wanted or something like that and how different it is now for her. Impression: wtf kind of thing is that to say on a date??

Anyways I have to say after all those faults I decided to give her a goodnight kiss on the lips at the end. It was wrong since I wasn't interested, but I thought in some way it would be nice since she seemed so negative on dating and maybe she'd realize that there are nice cool guys out there!

But alas.. it was a mistake for me, because she e-mailed me saying what a great date she had.. but alas I didn't want to date her again, so I told her later that I think I'm starting to get more serious w/ another girl so I probably shouldn't see her anymore, but told her she's nice and she should keep looking and not give up! I thought that would be a convenient lie to not hurt her feelings.

Whats her reaction? Well.. she was pissed and called me a cheater! Wow thats pretty whacked. I felt bad but oh well hope I don't run into that psycho.

What did I learn from this? Well.. its not good to give mixed signals. I am somewhat on auto-pilot on dates at times which is not too smaaat.

Did I mention I'm done w/ dating? Hahaaa.

My current state of thinking

While walking home after buying some underwear @ Macys, I came to think about what I'm looking for in a girl. Its not easy to qualify.. obviously you want it all, but whats the most important thing?

I think the big shallow thing all people (guys especially) have is the issue of wanting someone who is physically attractive as the primary factor. I don't understand the reason for it, whether it is purely biological/chemical, or if it is a trained response to media blitzes and propaganda. For me, its not top of the list, but at times I wish I could put it lower on the list than it is because it is somewhat disturbing to be focused on looks too much.

I admire people who look beyond those things. I wonder if I can train myself to not focus on looks at all. Yeah, thats something to think about.

I think this came up because I meet alot of girls who I am just not physically attracted to. I try to give it a chance, but its not like my last 2 gf's who I was just smitten with. I feel the need to be smitten.

I Question

Where is the best place to meet people for relationships?

I can think of the following..
1) Clubs
2) Bars
3) Friends & Family
4) Work or School
5) Online
6) Randomly in life

Problem with #1 & #2 is that you never know what you're getting from unqualified leads like these. Plus people look & act different in the club atmosphere, esp after you've been drinking!

Anyways this has no point to it. I think the best is to just get out there and be active and meet people and just enjoy life.

This Saturday I went to my friend Moola's birthday party w/ Boo, Booby, and my coworker Godd @ Medjool. Not a bad night out. Afterwards we had Pho which is always tasty. Funny, everyone goes to this Pho place after clubbing. In fact, we saw one group of girls that Godd hit on (and was rejected badly by) at the same tiny Pho place. Funny because its not next to the birthday party spot at all.

I think Godd is a fairly good looking white guy, but he got rejected like a schmuck by these girls that should probably be below his standards. Some girls are 'unhittable' and just don't want to be hit on. Some girls are really friendly. Some want to be hit on. Some only talk to asians or whites, or whatever their taste is. Never know till you try.

Ups and Downs of Living Life

On the up: My 401k is +20.6% right now for the year. Wow, how'd that happen?
On the up: My other 401k is +19.2%.
On the up: My personal portfolio is +13.6%.

That means.. my active trading strategy is doing worse than funds. Interesting. Is it a timing issue or does this mean I should just stick with funds? My personal portfolio has alot of iShares (ETF funds) though. It must be the losers dragging me down.

On the down: Still feeling sick from Monday's party, or from my nagging cold
On the down: Feeling sorry for myself about my ex again
On the down: Not happy with the girls I'm presently dating
On the down: Concerned today about my career and where its going

Oh well, thats life man. You gotta just tough it out. I think being sick brings back the memories of how my ex used to take care of me and nurse me back to health like when I had Mono. Oh well, I will make it okay.

Went out to dinner w/ Boo and Booby and then to Minna and met up with McG. I wasn't feeling that good, but its good to just get out rather than mope at home.

VN trip is coming up quick!

Take it easy there...

Thats so fucked up. I actually didn't remember writing that last blog yesterday where I'm saying how drunk I am..

Anyways like I said, I went to Boo's for a dinner party last night. Man I apparently drank way too much because I am still feeling ill like 24 hours after the party started. Hmm.. I didn't think I drank that much wine, but I guess over 5 hours I was continuously sipping.

Felt really sick. Bleah. I need to slow down or my liver is going to fail.

It was fun. I met a 1/2 japanese, 1/2 taiwanese girl who is pretty cute, although Boo already dated her a little while ago. Kind of gross, its like sloppy seconds.

Boo party

Oh man I am so drunk.

Just came back from boo's party... his friend is really hot. wow. i'm drunk. gotta go throw up or something.

bye

Real World girl @ Rogue

Oh it turns out that korean girl Jamie from the Real World San Diego goes to Rogue. McG and I saw her but didn't know who she was. We were trying to figure out if we should hit on her (or he should since he was hot for her), but she was surrounded by 5 layers of people. She knew everyone. McG thought he heard some random guy ask to take a photo with her and I was like ???? wtf is that.

Now that we have verified it is Jamie from Real World, it makes sense why someone would ask for a photo and why she would do it.

Well there you go. Friday night Bartops at Rogue has celebrities in play. That place sucks, I refuse to go there again.

Sometimes people look better/worse in tv vs real life. Jamie looks pretty cute in real life. I guess she is way cuter now that we know who she is!!

Dating Rules Revisited

So I ponder what the current rules of dating are.

If I am dating a girl, and I kiss her, does that mean I shouldn't be going out on other dates and kissing other girls? What if I go to 2nd base, 3rd base, etc? At what point is a person a dirty rat?

Its somewhat up to the person I suppose. It seems some women feel that if you are kissing one girl, then you shouldn't be dating anyone else. To me that sounds a bit draconian. In fact, you could be sleeping with one girl, and still be dating around. It all depends on the mutual agreement right?

Or is there an implied agreement when things get to a certain point? Hmm... its tricky for shure (note the spelling of 'sure' in honor of Tombo).

I ask this because I wonder if I'm being a bad guy. I'm not serious with anyone, but maybe with one girl it is getting a tiny tiny bit more serious, such that I feel somewhat odd that I invited another girl to my xmas party, and still go on dates w/ other girls. Juggling dates.. its not too good. It may be a sign that I'm not into this girl enough.

Party On!

Tonight I went to my corporate party at City Hall. It was fun.

I decided last week or so to invite this korean gal that I was trying to date.. unfortunately she is more into partying than dating, so I didn't get much dating in during the past 2 months or so. Also, she lives in fremont, so it makes it a bit inconvenient to date. But alas, she came with me, I figured she's good eye candy at the very least.

Met most of my coworkers there which was cool.

I think my date had a decent time anyways. She is a cool gal, but I don't think we're totally compatible in the end. I am thinking she has implants due to her busting out bustline shape that she exhibited tonight. But alas, who knows, I was sick today so my ability to make a real move was limited. Otherwise I would have at least gone for a base1 move. Oh well, thats life. She's a good contact since she knows a LOT of people and is a nice gal.

Thats the end of the 2006 party life!! Next stop, Vietnam!!